No matter how far.

My life has a funny/weird way of showing me the things that i need and don't need in my life. it shows me my faults and strengths when i don't even want to deal with it. When I'm not ready to do certain things, when I'm comfortable in my own space it just comes in a smacks the shit out of me like i did something horribly wrong.

Why now in my life?

My 22nd birthday was yesterday. I don't feel like a 22 year old. I've always felt like a grown ass woman since about 16. i had to raise me. my mother was doing her own soul searching. and in turn i had to do my own. and on my own. with little help and still a small amount of help from her. i love my mother dearly. but she'll NEVER understand the life that i live. my mind is so much more open than hers.

This nigga wants to marry me.
lol.
be serious dude.

People tell me all the time that when love comes(real love) I'm gonna run from it and laugh at it.
but i know he's young and i know that i never even intended on entertaining him and his antics, but hes a young vibrant man that wants alot...but as i was told and i stress to him. you're not going to want the things that you wanted at 19 at 25 no where near. but his back story doesn't prove him to want anything but love, and attention, no affection nor attention from a mother figure in his life.

and no real feeling of family or stability. so I'm guessing that things will eventually come out as they usually do.

I love myself.

i love the things that i have completed in life already and that i will complete in the future.

there is nothing like self accomplishment.

nothing like someone being proud of you. but even more so you being proud of you.

I've never been one to dwell in the moment. i do it. get it done. and move on. why hold on to one moment when you can make so many more.

I'm getting myself mentally prepared to take on these new endeavors.

I'm really ready to go back to school. not back to the bullshit but back to the grind of school. the actual work ethic of it. the accomplishment.

the final destination. being a Graduate.

ok.

enough for today.

i'm out pandora is calling me.lol.
and so is my CARVEL ICE CREAM BIRTHDAY CAKE.

bye.

.chan.